Managing Anxiety: Real Talk & Real Tools
Let’s be real—anxiety is something a lot of us deal with, whether it shows up as overthinking, avoiding things, racing thoughts, or that tight feeling in your chest. As a female therapist of color, I know that life comes with unique pressures that can turn up the volume on anxiety, especially for teens and adults trying to navigate identity, school, family, work, social life, etc. Let’s break it down, unpack what anxiety really is, and talk about how to manage it in ways that actually work.
What Is Anxiety, Really? Anxiety is your brain's way of reacting to stress and alerting you to potential danger. It can show up as physical/somatic symptoms (like a rapid heartbeat, headaches, muscle tension, butterfly feeling in your stomach, difficulty breathing, sweating or feeling shaky), mental symptoms (like racing thoughts, fear, or difficulty focusing), and behavioral symptoms (like avoiding certain people, places, or responsibilities).
A little anxiety can be normal—even helpful. It can keep you alert before a big test or help you prep for a job interview. But when anxiety starts to control your choices or affects your daily life, it’s time to check in.
Why Anxiety Hits Hard in Our Communities: For teens and adults, anxiety doesn’t always look like it does in the textbooks. It might be masked as irritability, perfectionism, shutdown, or people-pleasing. Add in cultural expectations, generational pressure, or trauma, and it makes sense why anxiety might feel like a constant background noise.
Types of Anxiety: Not all anxiety is the same. Here are some of the most common types:
Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD): This involves persistent, excessive worry about everyday things—like school, work, or relationships—that lasts for six months or more.
Social Anxiety Disorder: This is more than just shyness. It includes an intense fear of being judged or embarrassed in social situations.
Panic Disorder: Characterized by sudden panic attacks that come with physical symptoms like chest pain, shortness of breath, and a sense of doom.
Phobias: These are intense fears of specific things—like heights, spiders, or flying—that go beyond typical discomfort.
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD): Involves intrusive thoughts (obsessions) and repetitive behaviors (compulsions) aimed at reducing anxiety.
Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD): Anxiety that develops after experiencing or witnessing a traumatic event. It can include flashbacks, nightmares, and emotional numbness.
Separation Anxiety: Though common in children, it can affect teens and adults too. It's the intense fear of being away from a person or place that feels safe.
Tools That Actually Help:
Box Breathing: Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4. Repeat 3-4 times. This calms your nervous system and helps you feel more grounded.
Name It to Tame It: Saying out loud (or journaling) what you’re feeling helps your brain shift from reacting to processing. "I’m feeling anxious because I have a test and I’m worried I’ll fail." By doing this, you’re already taking power back.
Limit the Scroll: Social media can fuel comparison, anxiety, and overstimulation. Set screen limits or unfollow accounts that make you feel "less than."
Stay Connected: Anxiety loves isolation. Text a friend, talk to a trusted adult, or join a group that helps you feel seen.
Therapy Is a Tool, Not a Taboo: Therapy isn’t just for when things fall apart. It can be a safe space to explore your feelings, set boundaries, and learn skills to manage anxiety before it snowballs.
Extra Support:
There are several Apps, books, podcasts that are tailored toward anxiety, anxiety education and anxiety management.
Hotlines: Need someone to talk to right away? Call or text 988 for 24/7 support.
Anxiety doesn’t define you, and it doesn’t mean you’re weak. You’re human. And being human means you get to ask for help, take breaks, and build tools that support your peace. If you’re ready to talk more about anxiety or start therapy, let’s connect. Your healing matters, and you deserve support that gets you.
